Not so long ago I decided to stay home, watch kids and pretty much be June Cleaver. One HUGE problem, I had NO idea how! Like most things on TV she made it look easy! Here I am now 5 months into it and I felt so lost on what to do, how to do it and I began to feel overwhelmed by it all to be honest. I have never been the type of person to have my house looking “perfect”, everything in its place, tidy and organized. My house was no where near what my husband wanted it to be but I was happy knowing the kids had fun, they were taken care of and that was good enough for me! It has often been an issue in our marriage but I had learned to just accept that Mark was a “neat freak” and I am not so now; he had to learn to deal with me(such odd thinking!)
So one day a few weeks ago, a friend comes over( this friend’s house is always neat, tidy and everything has a place, the total opposite of me and before she came I “tidied up”, knowing how her house looks) but I think before the door was even shut she said “your house looks like a bomb went off in it” to which i replied “well I had kids today”. This sat with me for about a week, then I get a text from her asking amongst other things why am I ok with my house looking like it did? Now thankfully God puts people in your life that can speak things that may hurt you cause they are speaking the truth but, its in love so you are able to receive what they have to say. Don’t get me wrong it doesn’t make it easy but its how you react that matters. Kind of like if you were living in a bubble, they can see the outside of it, so maybe they know more about it then you do sort of thing! After a long exchange of text messages it was obvious I was the one with the problem and it went beyond just not caring.
For me it was a matter of knowing I had “stuff”. It wasn’t until I cleaned out my kitchen cupboards that I found 8 BOXES of crackers! Growing up was hard and often our cupboards where almost bare so now being an adult and having the ability to afford 8 boxes of crackers reminded me that I am not the “little girl who might be hungry and just has to deal with it cause we are going to Nana’s tomorrow where we will eat well” but that I had the ability to just walk into my kitchen and feed my “hunger”. So I told my husband as well as my friend that this year was going to be the year where I “get it together”.
So it began in our bedroom which is nice and peacefully clean and worked my way down. My issues had even filtered down to my kids rooms! So after going thru my house either finding it a home, donating it or trashing it I feel free of the “stuff”. I do still have some things to go thru and as I am doing the physical cleaning up, God is doing a deeper work with in me to free me from the mindsets that I will never have enough. Yes it has been painful, but so was the cross for Jesus! 2013 is the year where new territory is taken and the “stuff” goes! So just remember if someone whom you trust speaks something painful into your life, its your reaction to that thing they spoke which will determine are you going to run from it, or are you going to overcome it!
Exploring life 